Oh I never said it was easy... in fact, nothing in this world is easy. It is not easy to start a habit, and surely it ain’t easy to kick the habit. I tell you because I have been there before. If there is something that bad habits have taught me though; it’s that I am stronger than I would like to give myself credit.
To begin, I have been addicted to many bad things, I won’t mention them all because this note is not intentionally written to talk about the habits I had encounter, but to let you know how I kicked them - hence the title of this page. Two of the most challenging bad habits that I quit within the last five years are: cigarettes and gossip. I don’t know which was the hardest to be honest, and I don’t know which was the deadliest, but i tell ya: it wasn’t easy.
Smoking cigarettes, was the “cool” thing to do. Everyone did it, why not me? Well, I was wrong. If everyone jumped off a cliff, would I do it? And that was my point and the beginning to an end. I had quit other habits, why not this one? Why not me? Why not then? I was so addicted to smoking cigarettes that I had to have my morning cigarette --that is for you non-smokers-- right after I woke up. Then I would eat breakfast, and had to have another after each meal, the one before I went somewhere, the one when I arrived, the one after I left, the other one while driving, the one when I got home, the one when I was bored or needed to make a phone call, oh... what about the one just because and the one before bed. Yuck! --Good enough though, I had enough of it, I was done. I knew I wanted to quit and I knew how, but why was I not doing it? Was it because I didn’t love myself? Truth be told, it came down to that, realizing and not just realizing but internalizing what I --not the cigarettes, but I was doing to myself.
I tried to quit for a while, I tried and failed. I tried again and failed again, so .. what was the secret to staying QUIT? I tried different brands, I switched from menthol to regular to menthol to regular, I started to tell myself that it was ok to fail because at the end of the day I “enjoyed” it and it was ok because many people around me were smokers, in fact I would compare myself to others thinking that I was not doing so bad because John Smith smoked his whole life and never had cancer, blah blah. The truth is that I was lying to myself and I was forcing myself to believe a lie, the truth is that I was weak and my addiction was greater than myself. I called 1-800 No BUTTS, they sent me patches as a result I only wasted their time and patches, but I got the best advice and I wish I remember the counselor's name but she said: “You either do it or you don’t, there is not in between” and that is exactly what I had done in the past when I ended a friendship, relationship, addiction, bad habit... I had done exactly just that: I had DONE it.
As far as Gossip... ewww this one is tough because a lot of us engage in it without noticing sometimes that we are in it. Nevertheless, I know when I had had wrong intentions talking about someone not out of genuine concern, but mere gossip. It is shameful thing, it is vile, it is harsh and it is not right. It is not right for anyone to gossip. It is not ok to talk about other people’s business to anyone and it is not ok to want to find out about anyone’s business if they did or didn’t, if they are, aren’t, were or weren’t. Yet, many of us seem to struggle with that, but not many are strong enough to recognize how nosy one can be minding other people’s business-- and that my friend is what I realized and internalized. My purpose in life is to kick all bad habits to the curve, to be a better person and to edify myself. I want my life to be a testimony to others that we can kick all bad habits from our lives. I was the kind of person that would listen to gossip, why not, right? Everyone is talking about it! John Smith told me that Jane Doe went with So-and-So to do the I-Don’t-Know-What, but I didn’t believe it so I went and I asked... Sounds familiar doesn’t it? Yes, we have ALL been there, it is part of our bad habits. But I decided to quit it, how? By filling up my free time with things that really matter and things that will make me prosper internally. Like reading the Bible, praying, reading a book... because just like cigarettes: gossip is everywhere. So I just have to tell myself that today: I abstain from anything that doesn’t build up my character.
So, this is how I have kicked every bad habit I have had, and currently working on kicking other bad habits like not eating healthy and not exercising, yikes!! May this note give you light in your heart, and may it give you the strength to kick any bad habits you struggle with, and may you start to edify your character to be a better version of yourself...
Until next time!
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